When Mental Health Stigma Hits Home: Consequences and How Families Can Cope

In any given year, approximately 1 in 5 Canadian adults, or about 5 million people, experience a mental illness yet only a portion of individuals access health services for it. Although many reasons contribute to this sad truth, stigma (negative attitudes) and discrimination (unfair treatment due to the illness) are major factors.

People’s beliefs and attitudes about mental illness are shaped by many things, such as the media, messages from family members, and a lack of education. Also, when people don’t have personal relationships with those managing emotional problems, they may be more prone to engage in “othering”—seeing people with mental illness as somehow fundamentally “different.” Human beings often fear what they don’t understand, and keeping a distance from people with mental health problems can perpetuate stigma.

Cultural norms are especially important to consider with respect to stigma. Some culture’s view people with a mental illness as spiritual healers and shamans. Others, however, see having a loved one with mental health concerns as a disgrace. Some religious/spiritual belief systems profess that mental illness is caused by evil spirits and reflects weakness of character. Thus, stigma must be understood within the context of a person’s unique culture.

Consequences of Stigma and Discrimination

Stigma and discrimination, as well as the fear of judgment and unfair treatment, can have powerful consequences. Consider these common emotions, thoughts, and behaviors experienced by some people managing a mental illness:

Excerpted from Loving Someone with a Mental Illness or History of Trauma by Michelle D. Sherman, PhD, ABPP, and DeAnne M. Sherman. Copyright 2025. Published with permission of Johns Hopkins University Press.

Although these items focus on the person with the illness, families often have many similar experiences. For instance, encountering people who assume your loved one cannot do something because they have a mental illness can be painful. Watching your loved one be isolated or excluded can be heartbreaking.

Stigma and discrimination surrounding mental illness can lead people (and their families) to suffer in silence and become quite isolated. Sadly, without care, mental health problems often worsen and sometimes spiral to substance misuse, involvement with the legal system, and loss of housing, employment, and relationships.

Coping with Stigma

Although stigma and discrimination can be painful and have many negative outcomes, individuals experiencing the illness and their family members can cope together:

Surround yourself with people who will listen and not judge you.
If you’ve tried to educate or challenge unkind behavior in certain family members/friends and they remain judgmental, perhaps it’s time to set boundaries and maintain some distance from them. It’s okay to do so!
Support each other as a family. Look for and celebrate positive steps and small wins.
Peer support groups can be especially helpful in combatting stigma and discrimination. Organizations such as the National Alliance on Mental Illness (USA), AMI-Quebec (Canada), and Carers UK (England) offer a wide variety of support groups. Although it takes courage to share openly with others, the experience of being seen, accepted, and supported can be very helpful.
Remember that you both have choices surrounding what you share about the mental illness and with whom. You may discuss this issue periodically and decisions may change over time.
Hold onto hope and remember that recovery is possible! Treatment can work, and more effective services are being developed every day.
For families: Praise your loved one for seeking help. Remember that asking for professional help can be hard, so be sure to affirm their positive choices.

To learn many more ideas about how families and friends can cope with stigma and many other issues, we invite you to see our new book published by Johns Hopkins University Press: Loving Someone with a Mental Illness or History of Trauma: Skills, Hope, and Strength for Your Journey. We have a similar guide for teens in these families, namely I’m Not Alone: A Teen’s Guide to Living with a Parent Who Has a Mental Illness or History of Trauma. Sample chapters and additional information on both books are available on our website.

Author: Michelle D. Sherman, PhD LP ABPP is a board-certified clinical psychologist in Minnesota who has dedicated her career to supporting families of adults living with a mental illness or trauma history. She is a Fellow of American Psychological Association’s Society for Couple and Family Psychology, and was named their Family Psychologist of the Year in 2022. She is the Editor of the journal, Couple and Family Psychology: Research and Practice. She worked for 17 years in the VA system and as a Professor at the University of Minnesota and Oklahoma medical schools. In her personal life, she writes books (with her co-author mother) for family members who love someone living with a mental illness/PTSD (www.SeedsofHopeBooks.com).